THE UNHOLY RETURN OF JXFALLOUT!!!

What up sluts and gentlemen, after a many month hiatus (and numerous e-mails bitching abut when I'd be back), I'm finally marking the return of semi-regular posting here at the ol' blog!

In honor of this little return, you can expect the first true posting in the next few days (maybe even tomorrow if I'm not too drunk and/or fucking a fat chick). Not only that, but the post in question will be bashing a once popular "internet celebrity" (god that term looks so wrong...) who seems to only post new material nowadays as often as Halley's Comet is noticed.

Don't know who I'm talking about?

Well, then you should click here this line of text to find out!

127,867 people probably have read my postings at least once.

Amusing Video Regarding Homosexual Marriage

First off, I'm not gay, but I support homosexual couples being able to live out their lives as any heterosexual couple would (and yes, that includes the ability to get married).

As such, I found this video that was posted at F*cking C*nts (a blog I regularly follow, and sometimes post in the comments section of) to be pretty amusing (although quite sad at the same time):




Dammit religion, why do you have to go and ruin everything in the long run?!?!?

Obama + Dijon Mustard + Right-Wing Media = LOL!!!!!

So apparently, Fox News and other right-wing media outlets are blowing a gasket over the fact that Obama ordered a burger WITH DIJON MUSTARD!!!! WON'T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!?!?!

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-talk-mustard-obamamay11,0,1652607.story

Barack Obama's mustard: President puts spicy mustard on burger and lands in new 'elitist' pickle with right

Kevin Pang

May 11, 2009

Conservative commentators seeking ways to pillory the president have found their latest weapon: mustard.

Oh, not patriotic, 76-trombones-along-the-parade-route yellow mustard. But pretentious, elitist, higher-tax-bracket Dijon mustard.

When President Barack Obama and Vice President Joe Biden made a stop at a burger joint in Virginia last week, Obama reportedly asked for "spicy" or "Dijon mustard."

Right-wing talk show host Laura Ingraham weighed in: "What kind of man orders a cheeseburger without ketchup but Dijon mustard?" Sean Hannity of Fox News invoked the Grey Poupon commercial. "I hope you enjoyed that fancy burger, Mr. President," Hannity said.

This has Barry Levenson, founder and curator of the Mt. Horeb Mustard Museum, shaking his head. The museum, just west of Madison, Wis., features more than 5,000 mustards, the largest such collection in the world.

"There's nothing pretentious about Dijon mustard," Levenson said. "It's a very simple product."

Dijon mustard has its origins in France, where monks made it with mustard seeds, vinegar, water and some salt.

But the Grey Poupon ads from the 1980s -- showing two British gentlemen snootily asking for Dijon -- cemented the mustard, rightly or not, as a condiment for aristocrats and gourmands.

"You have to understand that those ads were an effort to elevate cooking in America," said Levenson. "It was an effort to tell people you can buy something that's not too expensive, but it makes you feel elegant."

First off, I'm quite amused that there's a mustard museum (moreso one that is in my home state).

Back on the subject at hand, keep up the good work Hannity (and right-wing media in general)! You're doing more damage to your political party than any Democrat could!!!

Seriously though, mustard? MUSTARD?!?!

There are companies going out of business and people losing their jobs everyday, and these people bitch about mustard?!?! What's next?

He eats his burger ON WHEAT BREAD!

He eats ribs WITH A FORK!

He prefers his toast WITH STRAWBERRY JELLY!

Christ almighty, why don't we just revert back to Freedom Fries in order to show them French folk who's boss!!! USA USA RAMBLE RAMBLE RAMBLE USA USA USA!!!!

Hey Microsoft, Create Mac/Linux Versions of Your Fucking Zune Software!!!!

I, like many people, own a Zune. It's a great MP3 player with many features that make it better than most Ipod models.

There's just one problem, the Zune software isn't available for Linux or Mac!!!

Microsoft, get off our fucking high-horse, and release non-Windows versions of the Zune software!!!

"B-but, that will keep people from buying our Windows software!"

They're already buying your fucking MP3 player, so why not open it up to more potential customers as well (thus potentially increasing your income). Apple created a Windows version of its Itunes software (and also allowed for numerous developers to implement Ipod support into their own software, regardless of the operating system) and they seem to be making quite the profit, so what the hell is stopping you from creating a non-Windows alternative?!?!

More Goddamn Changes Coming To The Goddamn Blog!

With the recent addition of the Twitter feed on the side of the blog (assuming you even gave a shit), you can probably notice that the blog has been going through a much needed overhaul.

Do not worry (DAMMIT, I SAID NOT TO WORRY!!!!), we will be finished with the updated layout soon! Also, be on the lookout for an actual blog entry coming soon as well!

Comic Sans: WHO GIVES A FUCKING SHIT?!?!?!

Over the last few months, a much heated debate over something completely stupid has arisen: Should the font "Comic Sans" be done away with?

http://lifehacker.com/5219538/should-comic-sans-be-banned

...

Yes, out of all the shit that people could be discussing, they instead choose to argue over a fucking font type!!!! People, it's a fucking font type!!!

Don't like it? Don't use it!

Don't like people who use it? Ridicule them, or switch the text to something else!

Just please shut the fuck up about it!!!!!!!

Follow Up To Last Entry

Figured I'd link you perverts to the photos in question of the cheer coach:

http://www.clubglamour.net/galleries/carlie-christine/

Commence the masturbating!!!

High School Cheer Coach Fired For Playboy Pics

It's official, you can get fired from your job for having a private life!

http://cbs13.com/local/High.School.Cheer.2.985172.html

High School Cheer Coach Fired After Posing Nude

ORANGEVALE, Calif. (CBS13)

She posed nude and now she is out of a job. CBS13 went to Casa Robles High School to find out about the cheerleading coach turned Playboy centerfold.

"The girls are supposed to look up their coaches," says one concerned parent.

She bared all, all over the internet. Casa Robles High School officials in Orangevale confirm with CBS13 that their girl's cheerleading coach, Carlie Christine, was the one who posed nude in a playboy centerfold.

Christine is also Playboy's 'cyber girl of the week.'

For obvious reasons we can only show a few of many provocative poses from Playboy.

Parents and some students, who did not want to be identified, exposed the coach to school officials after rumors started slowly getting out that she had posed nude.

"I think it's unacceptable. It's not fair," says Jamye Curtis.

What apparently uncovered the coach was when some girls didn't make the cheerleading squad because they had a few unexcused absences from school. Their parents then made copies of Christine and dropped the pictures on the principal's desk.

Christine was then fired from her position at Casa Robles High School.

"And I was in shock that I knew the girls had seen it and knew about it," a parent told CBS13.

A lot of parents and faculty are talking and looking.

"The whole football team has seen it," says one parent.

I just love the last line of the article.

Anyways, why on earth is she being punished for what she did (legally, I might add) outside of the school? She gets fired, while the little dipshits who got cut from the squad for missing classes (you know, which is a valid reason to punish someone) get away with having her fired.

Even worse, the girls' parents were in on the whole plan to have her axed from her position. People, your kids fucked up by missing classes; what exactly are you teaching them by helping to get their coach fired for doing her job (and also for appearing in Playboy, something your possibly fat daughters can only dream of doing)?!?!

You know what? This chick is going to get the last laugh when Playboy or another similar magazine contacts her, and has her pose for possibly even more money than before (you know, since she's more popular now than when she was employed at the school)!